To be better: find contacts with our values

At least one way, like most people – I often think about ways I can be better. There are moments when I realized, when immediately thinking, that I could take a better path to work, and I often pledge silently to take better action when providing similar conditions in the future. Unfortunately, the future often reaches and finds me to do the same things again. Here, I also think I am not alone, otherwise Self -help The library department will be less crowded, and there will be no prosperous literature on the intention a personality Change features, topic about What I wrote before in this space.

The beginnings of the idea

Soon after searching in Changing personality Literature, I decided that I would want to dip my feet into this water, and merge personal and professional interests. So on a two -year vacation, I spent a lot of time searching for some relevant topics taking into account my special studies on how to help people change their behavior for the better. In the end, I decided to try to import some concepts of literature in clinical psychology – where we try to treat concerns about behavior, perceptionwow Passion– For situations that do not necessarily aim to treat but simply improve, regardless of the current level of distress.

Watching with this philosophyWhat was silent was something that might fall under the umbrella of positive psychology (to see a review, see Carr et al., 2020), and the specific method to treat (Act; Hayes, Strosahl, & Wilson, 2011), which seeks to connect behavior and personal values ​​with positive ends //

Current experimentation

In an attempt to help people act more with their chosen values, I meet them and ask whether there is any behavior in their lives who want to engage in many cases. This initial answer takes a variety of shapes, such as “spending more time with my grandmother”, “practicing” or “enhancing my relationship with God”. My only rule is that it should be a concrete behavior that you want to do more and then you must have a degree of control at least. Therefore, if the relationship with God is strengthened, we discuss the specific things that one might do (for example, we pray, read a religious text, etc.). Once the required behavior is determined, we seek to connect it to the personal value. I often reach here by asking “Why” like a five -year -old child (why do you spend time with the grandmother?), Which is annoying, but it is mostly effective.

The behaviors of the previous example can be derived from the personal values ​​of the family and personal health and Spirituality. From there, I ask the person to think about one other behavior that is in line with this value. After that, we are walking through the internal and external forces that lead to this behavior or does not happen in the life of this person at the present time, which helps us to generate some possible overlapping behaviors. It is often passed on a phone or something closer to this, but anything can be done by one instead of the desired behavior when they face the ability to engage in the desired behavior. Sometimes, this is just a normal avoiding or even things that may be positive or directed to goals such as work or cleaning. In such cases, we only bring the times when we participated in behavior instead of One of the things we try to do more. We conclude this session with a list of two desired and behavioral behaviors that may interfere with our aspirations.

Then I feed the value and behaviors chosen in the application of the program that I designed, and the participant performs a daily examination where they are reminded of our conversations about values ​​and behaviors and asked mere registration – if it is – one of the four behaviors that we discussed on that day. At the end of three weeks, we meet again and discuss what happened.

Early surprises

At this stage, I just performed a handful of sessions, but I had to write about it because of an unexpected thing that appeared early. Hope and expected such a study is to enhance both of them Mind Admission to self -direction and value -based life may lead to an increase in valuable behaviors, and may decrease in unnecessary behaviors, and perhaps in turn a greater feeling of the goal in life and/or feelings of personal luxury.

These things may actually be observed as this work is exposed, but today the focus on the fact that some people have been informed that when monitoring is closer, they actually lived according to their values-at least Morisu than they believed at the initial meeting when they identified their aspirations. They said that intervention-instead of gradually increasing their required behaviors-helped them actually see the meaning in their days, which were already present, just awaiting recognition.

After I noticed it, it is now clear in the context of the theories related to the mind, but I will admit it was an unexpected way to achieve the greater project goal. Technically, I wanted to help people lead a more feasible life, but if I have to settle to recognize the meaning already in their lives, I will consider this with pleasure. Most of my victories are cross. Although I wrote this blog publication – in a line with my resurrection to engage in scientific work and discuss in order to improve the human experience – studying my phone. One of the deliberate improvement.

More importantly, I thought it might be useful to suggest others to pay attention For your values, what to do, and how you call. If there is room for improvement, you will see it. But you may also see that you are doing a good job.