Before we even be able to start understanding what our triggers try to tell us, we must clearly understand what is and what is not a trigger. So, first, consider the differences.
You are not triggered when someone hurts feelings. You are not triggered when you lose an argument. You are not triggered when you lose a friend due to an argument or a difference in values. You are not triggered when you feel anxious Or depressed. You are not triggered when you feel insulted or offended by something that someone says or does.
UNLESS One of these things reminds you of the past trauma and brings you back to the same feelings and thoughts that you had during or just after this trauma or trauma. Without the link with past trauma, it cannot be really considered a trigger. Perhaps it creates difficult feelings, but these are not called triggers unless they send you back to past trauma.
The word trigger, as used here, is a metaphor for the trigger of a pistol. Press the trigger and the pistol is triggered. In this same sense, an emotional or psychological trigger is generally a sudden interior event and quickly felt which brings back to feelings and thoughts surrounding past trauma.
Triggers can be subtle or manifest. An example of a manifest event that could be a trigger is when, in the middle of a strong argument, the other person begins to get closer to you. If there was no similar previous trauma, you might not be triggered, although you can have other emotional responses to the current event, which can help you know how to manage this situation. But if it is a trigger, it could bring your thoughts and emotions back to an event in the past where another person has done something very similar, and it ended up being a physically abusive encounter.
An example of a more subtle trigger could be a smell or a sound that rejects you to a previous trauma. In fact, in some of these cases, it is the body that reacts first to this subtle trigger. We could start feeling heart palpitations and starting to breathe quickly. These bodily responses are reactions to the sensory trigger. But the person who undergoes these physical reactions may even not connect the points between the sensory trigger and the bodily responses that later, when they had time to think.
What are triggers trying to tell you?
Above all, a trigger is intended to inform you of one or two things:
- You don’t feel safe. This feeling could actually be a warning of your psyche to go back, to draw a limitput an end to a relationship, etc. Or it could be a feeling that does not necessarily reflect a real problem. In other words, we can sometimes feel dangerous, even when the circumstances do not guarantee this feeling. At other times, not feeling safe is a warning.
- You are not completely finished with your psychological work on previous trauma. That not means that you have failed in your work or that you should Do better for the moment. It just means that there is more work to do.
A feeling of being dangerous can be very useful when it is a warning sign that you are in fact in a dangerous situation. You may be in a dangerous relationship. Maybe you realize that your workplace is toxic in such a way that it seems dangerous to you. Maybe you are walking on the street, and something is going on that makes you dangerous. We can be very grateful For this type of trigger, because although it can remind you of an earlier trauma, he also tells you that you do not want to repeat this trauma.
A feeling of being dangerous, although the circumstances are not really dangerous, is a very common type of trigger. Something subtle or manifest – even one of your own thoughts – allows you to make previous trauma, and you feel extremely anxious, even panicked and uncertain about what to do to eliminate feelings or rectify the perceived situation. This is when special measures, such as breathing exercises, meditationEarthmail techniques, and the use of certain applications could come into play. This could also be the time to speak to a trustworthy or a therapist to help you not only manage the specific answer you have, but also to recognize and deal with previous trauma and their responses.
And as indicated above, you can always have a psychological work to do to put trauma in the past, where they belong. But that the trigger tells you that you feel dangerous or that you have more work to do, or both – they are trying to be useful. They did not come to haunt you or make you feel “sick” or not “normal”. They just try to help you take care of you.
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