Why do it seem that many people lack sympathy?

In these divisive times, people on both sides of the political corridor accuse each other of not being sympathetic, but is it really possible that half of the population of the United States lack sympathy? While there are certainly people who lack sympathy, they constitute a very small percentage of the population. So what really happens here?

The first problem is that we are talking about sympathy as if each of us either had or not. Reality is not so simple. There are already three types of sympathy and our ability to each vary depending on our nervous biology and conditions. Let’s wrap the three types of sympathy.¹

Cognitive sympathy. Cognitive sympathy indicates the ability to understand another person’s perspective, including his reactions, ideas and feelings. Someone has a suitable cognitive sympathy to say, “I can definitely see why your reaction was this way.” Knowledge sympathy is an essential skill to resolve and exercise conflict during the conflict enhances relationships.

Emotional sympathy. Emotional sympathy when you are Feel and Passion Another person feels. For example, she may be torn when a girlfriend is shared with a tear that her dog died. Emotional sympathy enhances relationships by launching Oxytocinthe “Interconnection” HormoneWhich calms down Nervous system It makes us feel the other person’s call.

Emotional sympathy. Emotional sympathy is when a person’s emotional sympathy conveys them to work. An example of this is the person who felt sad because his friend lost her home in a flood, so he helped her move.

Our ability to all kinds of sympathy differs so that we are so severe Sympathy Sometimes very close at other times. pressure It is the largest adjustable factor that prevents our ability to express sympathy. Stress works to sympathize through three tracks:

1. Stress stimulates the friendly nervous system, and puts the body in a “fighting or flying” position. This physiological response forces us attention Inside to treat pressure, which weakens our ability to express sympathy.² For example, if a friend trusts you when you are under pressure, you will have difficulty treating his experience, which reduces your ability to express sympathy.
2. Stress also stimulates amygdala ( Fearful The center of the brain) which prevents activity in the frontal lobe, is part of the brain that regulates emotions and sympathy.² In general, the body and the brain’s stress prepares to treat pressure, which reduces the width of the frequency range to sympathize with others.
3. Stress also color our perceptions of others’ behavior in a way that makes them more threatening.³ For example, let’s say you are panic because you are late when your roommate calls the saying of their car collapsing. Your immediate response is “I am late, I can’t help you!” Instead of sympathy, you explain the behavior of the room colleague as a threat to your time. Under calm conditions, it is likely to have responded differently.

Certainly, people can still be sympathetic when they are under pressure. It is just a heavier emotional elevator, and if stress becomes chronic or extreme, the sympathy may become very heavy. We are all guilty of low sympathy from time to time, but this does not mean that we unable From sympathy. Here are five strategies to increase your sympathy.

1. Control of stress. Since stress prevents sympathy, the most effective way to maintain your ability to sympathize is to manage stress more effectively. Deep breathing, contemplationGood sleep, good feedingPracticing, to treatAnd medicine Everything is worth exploring for this purpose.
2. Look for sympathy. Receiving sympathy from another person releases oxytocin, which is a stress relief hormone.⁴ This means that keeping a friend during stress (instead of isolation) will not only reduce stress, but also revive the emotional frequency range of sympathy.
3. Avoid solving unwanted problems. When he is a friend of him, often, they are looking to hit oxytocin to relieve their stress and feel interconnected. That is why jumping to solve problems, during good faith, often with counterproductive results. The solution to the problems can be considered in a position in which sympathy was desirable in it is rejection or judgment by unintentionally sending the message that the person needs to be reform or ignored a clear solution. When someone is perpetuating you from venting, ask them first if they want to hear, embrace, or help them. You will be surprised by the number of people who choose and embrace, and how many people who helped. Most vent is simply accessing the connection.
4. Ask more questions. The way of sympathy lies in asking enough questions until you reach there. If you are confused from a person’s point of view, suggest the situation like the investigator, and collect all the information you can solve until the mystery is resolved. All behavior (and emotions) is logical once you get the correct information.
5. Emotional literacy brush. A patient once told me that the only feelings they know are Anger. This is a sign of Alexationmia, which indicates difficulty in identifying feelings.⁵ If you are having difficulty determining what you feel, the feelings of others will be more confused, and this makes sympathy very difficult. Treatments that focus on emotion may be useful because they teach people how to identify and organize feelings.

Let’s use all this information to address the original question about the reason that people on both sides of the political corridor are considered to be suffering from sympathy. The answer may lie in the extent that each group looks at the other as a threat. Feeling under threat leads to a response to stress, and this takes us away from sympathy and self -protection. We left this in a position in which two groups feel threatened, with no sympathy for the other. Progress will require the publication of the threat by starting the points of agreement and preparing between the two parties to ask many questions, and most importantly, to manage the stress response.