An honest message from your therapist

to treat It is not easy to participate in it. Seeking and committing to treatment requires weakness, and weakness seems dangerous to the person Nervous system. When we open up, we risk rejection, shameExposure and loss of control. Humans are wired to protect themselves from pain, not walk toward it. I talked about this hypothesis in my TEDx talk.”Overcoming emotional avoidance“So, when a person sits down for therapy and faces himself, this act is not weakness, but an act of courage.

It takes extraordinary courage to sit in front of someone, let down your guard, and say, “This is where I hurt.” – To take risks, speak vulnerable, and ask for help.

As therapists, we experience that moment every day. We don’t take that for granted. We feel proud and happy because we trust parts of ourselves and elements of people’s lives to be personal, private and dear.

Whether healing shockhealing sadnessor the healing of self-abandonment, or the healing of nervous systems equipped to survive, it is a great honor to walk alongside you.

An honest message to those in treatment

Thank you.

Thank you for allowing me to witness to you. Thank you for trusting me with your thoughts, emotions, and circumstances that you never said out loud; Memories you have repressed, acted upon, or defended; Patterns that you are ashamed to admit; And the longings that you were afraid to name. Thank you for showing up. Thank you for staying, even when your mind and body fought back. And thank you for doing the beautiful and very difficult work of healing.

I am honored to sit with you. I am deeply moved when I watch you tap into your true, generous, whole, worthy self. Partnering in your evolution and transformation is a gift you give to yourself and me. I’m truly happy when I see you grow into who you already were, underneath the pain.

Avoiding your feelings keeps whatever you’re wrestling with alive and fermenting in your system. With increased awareness, when you avoid thinking about your challenges, you get short-term relief, but the pain remains fragmented and unprocessed, and it tends to come back with greater force. Therapy asks you to do the opposite: notice, turn toward, allow, and feel. You are intentional and proactive. This is emotional strength and behavioral courage in action.

I can watch that courage take shape in real time.

I watch the moment you stop saying: “Why am I like this?” Instead ask calmly: “Where and why did you learn to do this?” This shift that I committed to and initiated, from self-government to self-understanding, from self-criticism to self-compassion, is the healing process that I helped launch and sustain. You contribute to your growth trustmore ResilienceAnd better results that align with your values. I can witness it all fondly.

I also see that you are becoming more honest with yourself.

Treatment is not just detection. It’s accountability. It’s looking at patterns that once felt protected and asking, “Does this still serve me?” This presents a challenge to introspection. You have stayed true to your growth. Sometimes you discover that a coping strategy that once protected you, e.g PerfectionismEmotional numbness, over-performance, people-pleasing, or withdrawal are now isolating you, disconnecting you from your needs, or exhausting you. You slowly abandoned the old strategies, even though it seemed terrifying at times, because at some point in your life, it was all you knew and how you survived.

Wanting to look at yourself honestly, e.g. avoidance, defensiveness, AngerSeparation, control, and the question: “What is this protection?” Instead of “What’s wrong with me?” Powerful and deeply human. The ability to remain psychologically flexible and stay with your current experience, even when it’s painful, and keep moving in the direction of what matters to you – says a lot about your improvement. You are choosing to let go of your narratives, negative core beliefs, and habitual emotions, and literally rewire your mind to think, feel, and act more expansively and helpfully.

I see you are connecting with yourself much more.

I see you connecting to feelings that you may not have been able to feel growing up. I see you grieving for what you didn’t have – safety, tenderness, harmony – and allowing that grief to be real instead of ignoring it. I see you doing things like identifying and emphasizing your needs border Then you sit with me, terrified that you are “too much,” “too demanding,” or “selfish,” and we breathe that shame together. I see you Forgive Yourself for not being able to save everyone. I see you learning that receiving care is not a weakness.

I cannot tell you how proud I am of you in those moments.

Therapy is often framed as “you come in, you tell me what’s wrong, I give you insight or tools.” This is not what is actually happening in the room. What happens between you and me is connection and relational healing. I provide a holding environment and a safe space for you to be seen, heard and cared for.

Humans heal in safe connection. We participate in organizing. When you sit with me, I remain present with you as you experience whatever happens to you, whatever it is He is afraid,sadness, anger, panicor numbness, and I do not leave, or shame you, or interrupt you, or demand that you be different. Your nervous system learns, slowly, to relax. Together we facilitate a corrective emotional experience. This is compensatory. This is medicine.

I fully realize that it is an honor to be in this role.

I’m moved, often, so deeply when you say things like, “I can’t wait to see you and share with you,” or “I’ve never told anyone this,” or “This time with you was so helpful.” I feel these comments deeply, because I truly care about you and your well-being.

Part of my responsibility is to create a space where you won’t be judged, pathologized, or rushed; To challenge you when it serves your growth; And to protect you while you explore yourself.

But what I want you to know is that partnering with you in your development and journey has deep meaning for me. I am honored when you allow me to walk beside you. I would be honored if you would allow me to sit with you as you hold and experience your array of thoughts, feelings, and body sensations. I am honored when you allow me to celebrate your joy.

I can see it all: the challenges, the pains, the accomplishments, and the joy. I can watch you rejoice and watch you return to your true home. I see you laughing. I see you doing better. I watch you say and communicate “I deserve to take up space.” I’m really humble and… Thankful That you trust me with everything.

I see your strength. I see that you are acting from a place of self-respect and dignity. You embody and embrace: “My love life matters. My nervous system matters. My story matters. I matter.” Thank you again and again for allowing me to witness and share in your amazing development.

To enhance internal communication, listen to A Connect with an authentic self-guided meditation program Led by me.